I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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