Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
