he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize