Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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