so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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