Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Randomize