hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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