Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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