Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
