Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
