Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I wish i was in the wii world.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize