He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
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