I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?