and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Do you still have your period?
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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