R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
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