haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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