..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I just gargled with NyQuil
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
