I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
