Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
it's like iHOP with fire
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Houston, we have a blender
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
