He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Ladies don't puke and tell
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Randomize
