butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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