im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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