I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Randomize
