I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
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