Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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