Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
