i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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