During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize