Non-Jews are for practice
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
