So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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