if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
