Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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