Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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