There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
