coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
