yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Are my feet made of real feet?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
