so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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