i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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