If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
