Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
