He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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