just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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