I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Randomize
