So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
