nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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