I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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