I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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