i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Well I just put wine in my tea
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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