Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
