So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
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I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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