Non-Jews are for practice
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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