At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
